Back in my 20s my boyfriend (now husband) surprised me with sexy lingerie one Valentine’s Day. Unfortunately, his purchases had an adverse effect on my libido. Aside from being too small, the items were made of a very scratchy lace. Absolutely nothing about trying to squeeze my size 8 butt into an itchy size 4 thong made me want to get my groove on.
Since then, my husband has stuck to gifting me flowers and chocolate for the holiday. And, for the most part, I have stuck with T-shirts and sweats for my evening attire. In my mind, if lingerie didn’t work for me in my 20s, how could it possibly work for me in my 50s? Aren’t I too old for sexy lingerie?
I asked this question of Elisabeth Dale, author and founder of The Breast Life, and she replied, “Are you too old for clothes? Because lingerie is literally the foundation for any wardrobe. And while all you see are younger models in lingerie in magazines, there are plenty of older models showing that self-confidence, which often comes only with age, is the key to true beauty. Especially when there’s not much fabric involved.”
Choosing lingerie that looks and feels good may take a little time and determination. Breasts may need a little more support as we age, but there are plenty of lingerie options that are both attractive and functional. Dale says, “Remember that bras are cut in many different ways. You need to play around and see which styles are right for your breast placement, projection, and size.”
Are you too old for clothes? Because lingerie is literally the foundation for any wardrobe.
If you aren’t into lace, think silks, satins, and velvets. And if you are worried about coverage, there are plenty of styles that reveal without being too revealing. Dale advises, “Corsets and retro-inspired lingerie styles have made a great comeback and are perfect for women who want to wear more while showing less. And you can always throw a pretty robe over anything to hide those bits you don’t want to show.” Our personal favorite: slinky pajamas. We’ve yet to meet a woman who didn’t look incredible in flowy, printed PJs.
For women who think, “What’s the point of nice lingerie since no one sees it?” Dale counters, “Why not wear something that makes you feel wonderful from the first moment of your day. Once you’ve put on a pretty matching bra-and-panty set, it doesn’t matter what you wear over it. It gives you confidence and self-assurance throughout the day. And, again, anything else you might wear reflects that attitude.”
Perhaps my biggest problem with the lingerie of my youth was that my husband picked it out instead of me, and I thought I should wear it for him instead of me. This attitude made me feel self-conscious instead of self-confident. The only real rule about lingerie and getting older is to wear something that makes you feel great.
As Dale says, “Lingerie is about bringing out our femininity and celebrating it! Women can wear whatever they damn please. The only person’s approval they need is their own.”
>READ: GETTING INTIMATE WITH YOUR UNDERGARMENTS
>READ: REDISCOVERING MYSELF AS A 50 YEAR OLD BURLESQUE DANCER
