I just got off the phone with an old friend and by old, I mean our friendship is old, not the two of us. We met when we started working together. I was just nineteen at the time. During our phone conversation she gave me a very sincere compliment. She told me that she loves reading my blogs because it feels like she hears me talking to her directly. She is going through a few ups and downs in her life and wishes she could look “happy” like the pictures I post. “How do you do it?” she asked. She knows a little of what’s going on in my life and was bewildered at how I can manage and still seem so content.
My personal life is not very Instagram perfect. There is a lot going on that I have not shared on social media. My real secret to a “happy life” is that I refuse to let circumstances rob me of joy. I told my friend that my pictures and the smiles are very real and genuine. They are not faked just for social media, I’ve chosen to remain happy and make the best of whatever situations come my way.
Currently, I’m doing exactly what makes me happy and it’s working on my blog. Yes, there are some unfortunate circumstances that remain personal because I choose to focus only on what is positive. I’ve accepted the fact that there will always be issues that come and go, but most importantly they go, and that’s the key, they will go away. You eventually gain emotional strength by pressing through life’s tribulations with a positive attitude. Most of the time bad news catches you off guard. No one is ever really prepared ahead of time for a crisis. Everyone has their share of life’s ups and downs. Trying to pretend otherwise is called living in denial.
I have friends that I confide in, but as for my writing, this is my therapeutic healing and I want to continue in a positive direction. I’m doing what I love doing in life and blogging makes me happy. I’ve learned to monitor my emotions and how I react to those unavoidable setbacks in life. We can’t control what others do or say, let alone control our future. By keeping a positive mindset instead of negative thoughts racing through your head, it will give you strength to move on. Another way I gain control over a bad situation is by taking one day at a time and not bringing it into the future. We’ve all had those bad awful days where you let worrisome thoughts take over. As for me, those are the days I can’t wait to go to sleep and wake up to a new day.
Finding a hobby, an activity, or a purpose you are passionate about is another way to secure your happy mentality. We all know the old saying “there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel,” right? Well, think about this one, “sometimes we need the darkness in order to see the light.”
Surrounding yourself with those who love you and those you trust is another important key to keeping your happy. I try to avoid people in my everyday life that make me unhappy. Notice I said avoid, because in some circumstances we cannot easily eliminate unpleasant people from our lives, especially if it’s a relative.
Perpetual happiness does not exist. We need to work at finding happiness every single day. Why? Because daily, things change. Some days finding happiness will be effortless, yet other days you are desperately seeking to find it. On those difficult days try reminding yourself what you are grateful for. Gratitude has helped me find happiness by appreciating the things I may have otherwise taken for granted.
Focusing on getting through one day at a time and not wasting your energy worrying will enforce your self-assurance. I started blogging with hopes of encouraging women to be the best version of themselves. Let’s face it, no one wakes up looking like the best version of anything when they first get out of bed.
What’s important to understand is that the best version of you is going to reflect thru your true character. It’s hard to hide stress with fake smiles. Finding your Happy is a process that requires a positive attitude. The surest route to a happy life is to start inwardly, first.
*As for the pictures I post, it’s the real me, although I should admit there are some days I’ll ask my photographer husband for several retakes.